Friday, June 13, 2014

A beautiful wedding... and thoughts on finding balance

A couple weeks ago we dragged our tired new parent butts up to Madison, Wisconsin, for a wedding. It wasn't just any wedding, though. We were going to celebrate a couple that we've become good friends with, who have been dating since before Joe and I knew each other! (Joe and I met almost 13 years ago.) Jess and Natan are a great couple, and we were so excited to join in the celebration of their marriage!

The wedding was held outside of Madison, and it was beautiful! Such a lush setting, in the midst of so much green and lovely rolling hills. The bride was radiant, the groom dapper, and spirits were high. The food was delicious, too! So many of our good friends were in attendance, ready to toast the newly married couple. Overall, it was the type of wedding that is incredibly enjoyable.

This was the first Jewish wedding I've been to.
It was beautiful, and especially touching since the Rabbi
was also a good friend of the bride and groom!

The flowers were lovely... but the bride was more beautiful than they were.
Too bad I sucked at taking pictures this night!

Elise got her own personalized glass, and
Joe decided to use it to drink his beer :)
As you might notice in the last picture, Elise looks totally spaced out. It was hot and reeeealy humid at the reception, and pretty buggy too. She didn't do well with the heat, and was acting really lethargic. Quite stressful for the new parents! And that's where "finding balance" comes into play. Before we had Elise, I always said that I'd just take the baby along with me, and that life wouldn't need to change that much. Ah, the things naive first time parents say! It turns out things like naps, loud environments, and extreme temperatures affect little babies more than I was initially expecting. Duh! This wedding was a good reality check for us. While we wouldn't have missed it, it was not the same experience as it would have been a year ago. Or even a year from now. We spent a decent chunk of the reception in a random air conditioned cabin, nursing, changing, and cooling down the baby. I couldn't drink much, and we ended up probably being the first to leave. You better bet we stopped for some booze on the way home... mommy needed a glass of wine once baby went to sleep!

This is where Joe and I work to find that balance. We do NOT want to be the type of parents who give up on socializing. We want to get out of the house with the baby, but we have to find reasonable ways to do that. Obviously, with a situation like a wedding, we just have to make the most of it. I'm still so glad we went, but I'm a little sad we didn't get to enjoy the day more. But for more day to day outings and events, we'll just keep figuring out how it works for us. We ended up skipping a street festival a few weekends ago because it was too loud and crowded, but we went down the street and has snacks and a drink at a restaurant we really like. That was good... rather than admit defeat and go home, we went to plan B, which worked for baby and parents. We've brought her to a couple cookouts and get togethers with friends, and just have to accept that we'll be the first to leave. But we're there! And I do think the concept of balancing will get a little easier in a few months, as Elise gets into a predictable routing and also grows a little less fragile. Not to mention numerous friends are currently pregnant, so they'll be relating to this scenario soon enough! Someone once told me, "your life doesn't END when you have kids, it just changes." How true that is! We love our new life, and this precious little baby. And as we work to find this balance, who's interested in getting together for more baby friendly gatherings? :)


  1. so true about the balance-- we stopped going out to later dinners after Gemma was born. now we go out to dinner at 5:30 with our other parent friends, and it's actually quite perfect: empty restaurants and toddlers in better moods :)

  2. I'm just hoping we can get out of the house with TWO kids, that'll be a reality check as we did a decent amount of getting out with Evan, but those times are a changin'!

  3. you. look. AMAZING. now that that's said, i really enjoyed this perspective and the way you approach it and work with each situation - definitely something to keep in mind in the future.